This is so hard for me to look at…but I know I only have myself to blame….I can not even think of fitting into those jeans today but by May I will be back in them. Twenty pounds may not seem like much but on a 5’4 frame it is a lot to gain back. I am sharing this to help others along the way but the main reason is to hold myself personally and publicly accountable to myself. This really is not about anyone but me. I know why I gained the weight back. I gained it back because I stopped doing what was working…eating clean and working out. I let stress and various challenges in life change my focus. I actually handle stress better when I eat clean and work out so why did I fall off the wagon…because I bought my own excuses…like:
I deserve to eat this peach cobbler late at night and not go work out because I dealt with a lot of stress today when in reality my thoughts should have been…wow let me go work out to release some of this stress and I will make sure I eat super clean so I can have the energy to deal with lifes issues.
I am going to eats at my favorite bbq spot and eat mac and cheese and 10 bbq wings dripping in bbq sauce because one of trucks broke down and I am mad…but actually I should have said…I better make sure I continue to eat clean and healthy so I don’t break down.
I sold a lot of jobs today so I am going to reward myself by going to my favorite restaurant and ordering everything on the menu that I like…what I should have done was say wow I am do proud of myself for selling a lot of jobs today so I will finish work early, pack a healthy pic nic and take my girls to the park and play for the rest of the day:)
I could have done so many things differently for the last half of the year but you know what no one ever made progress with coulda, woulda, shoulda so you know what I am going to shake this yukky feeling off and continue on the path that I restarted and focus on the progress I have made in the last 30 days:) In fact today I ate totally clean and I went outside and played with my 8 year old daughter! Rock on:)